Reading Footnote 321

It's 4 pages long.

It starts on page 1063.

And I am hurrying through it thinking, "I've got to get through this so I can get back to the "book", the "real" story - when the reality of course is that the footnotes are part of the story; and it's maybe beautiful (and cruel) (beautifully cruel?) how the "author" (never called him that before (usually it's the affectionate and familiar Dee-Eff-Double-You)) bounces you from page 785 (origin of the endnote) to page 1063 (actual endnote), then back to 785 - making you feel like the "book"/"novel" is never going to end: like the "author" is drawing a sideways-eight plot for me (on my hind-quarters?) the fading, weak, conventional reader - and all I have to do - all - is keep going. Keep going.