The spine calcification can otherwise be imagined as build-up or residue which has been making it harder and harder for me to tear off my daily reading very well.
As a result, I was imagining that by the time I got to page 500 for instance I'd be tearing into the text itself and that then in some weird form of vengence and natural law the "book" would start to reclaim it's totality with every tear - and that potentially by page 981 the book would put me into a checkmate situation where I could not tear, nor read - and I'd lose this game of book reading and the book would win and this whole process of Reading Infinite Jest would have been rendered meaningless.
However - when you do something frequently enough and reflect on it - you can defeat all things - except perhaps Death. I learned this from playing soccerfootball. Perhaps Dee-Eff-Double-You learned it from Tennis. It's called skill development. And just now my skill in tearing pages from stubborn book spines has reached a higher level.
As a result of this skill of mine I have hope that I will achieve my goal of getting to page 981 and be able to read it's contents clearly. Whether or not I can understand what I've read is another matter all together.
All this talk of spines brings to mind a term coined by someone I knew in Vancouver in a past life.
ReplyDeleteThe term is "spinal value," and it refers to the supposition of prestige conferred on the owner of a book by having its spine visible in the owner's home (eg facing outward from the owner's bookshelf) to visitors easily impressed by this sort of thing. So, eg, the I Ching or Steven Hawking's A Brief History of Time would, through their spinal value, create the impression that the owner was steeped in spirituality, science, etc and whatever.
Obviously, someone interested in augmenting the spinal value of his bookshelf would need only to buy whatever books he felt would most likely impress his visitors. Reading the books would be merely an adjunct activity, not strictly necessary. Visitors' inquiries about this sort of thing rarely require any kind of specific response... (Visitor: "Oh, Gravity's Rainbow. I started it once..." Owner: "Mmm. Yes. Pyncheon's one of my favourites. Wonderful prose stylist.")
Vivant's singular method of reading IJ renders it impossible for its spinal value to impress his visitors. He'll have to greet them at the door and flat-out tell them he's read DFW. Or maybe staple the chunks of pages to the wall of the entrance foyer of his home. A wall of book.
Flynn - The Dads would be proud of you. What a great - though disturbing - insight. Now what though?
ReplyDeleteIf I'm going to read this monster (and kill and dismember this monster) - I'm going to want to talk about it, gain some social cred from it or at least gain some notoriety. So the spine thing is a problem.
Last Thursday for instance I sat in the seductive Red Salon at the front of Pinot Paul's house with his Very Powerful Wife. I drank wine with her and watched the candles flicker as someone secretly made the light go dimmer and dimmer. And the place was loaded with Spines. Sexy Spines. Infact the Very Powerful Wife used Peter Watson's "Ideas" as a coaster.
The whole time I drank nervously thinking it was all a set up. You know, I get drunk, I start behaving like a Real Man and Pinot Paul arrives home unexpectedly and finds me alone in a very dim red room with his Very Powerful Wife and all hell breaks out. Pinot and I wrestle around the Red Room, knocking over furniture and sending spines everywhere. The Very Powerful Wife, her reputation in tatters, makes an accusation, and with one wink to the cops I am sent to the slammer.
And it's all one big set up. Thankfully I had the sense to leave the Red Room before things became totally dark. Until you mentioned it Flynn I didn't realize that people did this with their spines and I'll be more wary of places like Pinot's which have curiously and deliberately placed spines in their environs.
Sadly then, Flynn, I guess books can become objects of suspicion and I'll never look at a spine-filled room the same way again.
So what to do now in my own case?
I do like the idea of stapling the pages to the walls in Serial Book Killer fashion - this would really impress the guests.
But how else to impress them?
I was thinking too that we could do something much more Of The Times - like develop a sports-like crest that could be sewn on a dinner jacket. The crest would have to represent something like The Infinite Jest Fellowship (ie: "...a fellow of infinite jest.") or even better, The Infinite Jest Academy. Yes - people would be impressed by that - an Academy. When people hear and see the word "Academy" they go into instant respect mode. Academies are places of the highest quality and distinction.